Hi guys,
How are you?
Today I want to talk about my confidence and how it has affected my life.
Let's start with a story.
So ever since nursery(i was 3 at the time) me and Kellie (code name) were the best of friends and I had another bestie Crystal but she wasn't in my class. So throughout the years me and Crystal became best friends but I was also best friends with Kellie.( I basically had two besties). However with Crystal I could be myself completely and it was fun. Around Kellie it was completely different sometimes she was great, she had a great imagination and we played some epic games. Other times she just wanted to put me down. Some days I just felt worthless and if you haven't felt worthless let me tell you it is horrible. An example was when we swang on the bars upside down and she told me I was being an ungraceful elephant with no dignity. That hurt. Then in year 6 we when to a holiday camp thing with the school for three day. My mum had written a list of all of the stuff I had taken so that I wouldn't forget anything( I used to lose/forget just about everything possible). However my mum is French and dyslexic and she isn't great at spelling, especially in English. So she may have written a word wrong, I think it was trousers but i'm not sure. So anyway when Kellie saw my list she laughed at me for being such a 'baby'(not sure how it made me a baby but hey) and when she found the spelling mistakes she showed them to everyone. I am a very protective person especially over my family so I pretended that it was me who made all of the spelling mistakes and instead of being a good friend she went and showed everyone else who hadn't seen it yet. Not surprisingly I was upset but luckily I had real friends to help me get the list back and shut her up. However she did much more than that she took all of my friends away from me and turned them against me.
She constantly put me down and made me feel like crap and because she sat next to me every lesson I couldn't escape her. When she came to ours she was rude to my sister and back chatted to my mum.
All of that was at primary school now that we go to high school we aren't together and I have only spoken to her once, when I bumped into her in waterstones.
Now I am starting to regain my confidence and although it has been hard to start believing in my self. I have some really great friends and I don't have to pretend to them, I can just be myself. It took me along time to realize that I could be myself and for 2 years I only had 3 or 4 friends. I find it easier to trust people and I understand that I am in control of my life.
Without Kellie I know I would be a more confident person and I would be doing so much more and I hope that I carry on gaining confidence so that I can do what I want to do in life.
The import thing is to believe in yourself , because with confidence you can do anything.
Let me know in the comments bellow how you are affected by your confidence or email me about anything at all @: theconfessionsofateengirl@gmail.com
Xxx-Summer
ps. sorry this blog post is sooo long I hope you have enjoyed reading it though.
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theconfessionsofateengirl@gmail.com
If you want you can start a gmail chat! I would love to hear from you and i have time to listen to each and everyone of you.
